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Bible Gets Girly Makeover

By Eleanor J. Bader

Capitalism is nothing if not inventive—and where a market is perceived, products inevitably follow. Take niche Bibles. In 1999, Thomas Nelson Inc., a Christian publisher, teamed up with Audio Adrenaline, a Nashville band, to form Extreme for Jesus, a subsidiary geared to young consumers. Their first release was Extreme Teen Bible, designed “to show teens that the Bible can be cool… return to article

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    ....And the Koran gets a manly makeover…..if you become a martyr by blowing up innocents you get- tell him Habib- sex with tons of underage virgins! Horrray!

    United States Posted by badda bing on Nov 26, 2003 at 7:34 PM

    I think that this type of thing is the most ridiculous waste of time and resources I have yet seen.

    Instead of trying to make things flashy and ‘appealing’, why not teach them the message? If people don’t want to read The Bible because it’s ‘Too-big’ or ‘too-long’ or ‘hard to understand’, then they’re not trying and their hearts have already shown themselves for what they are.

    United States Posted by Nathan on Nov 26, 2003 at 8:14 PM

    “showing themselves for what they are”? You mean, they’re showing that they can can think for themeslves, right? That they don’t let the religious hogwash about sex and sining make them guilty, right?

    United States Posted by roski on Nov 26, 2003 at 11:49 PM

    To Nathan: I don’t understand what you mean by the Bible. It really is two very different books . While the Old Testament refers to a cruel and vengeful God which gave the only title deed to a reduced number of people, the rest of us are always referred to as “the strangers”. Not to speak of the incredible Genesis which, if you add up the ages of all its characters, man and woman would have been created some million years after man appeared on earth. As for the Deuteronomy, it’s a collection of rules to be followed by “the chosen” , with leftovers given to the strangers, different interest rates to be charged to your own people or to those outside your door and other niceties. The Gospel talks about love to all, forgiveness and care for the weaker and poorer. How can you possibly ensamble the two? In the name of the Bible atrocities have been commited, kings have been appointed, American indians have been dispossessed and destroyed, and even the present president of USA is doing what he is doing in the name of God. Come on, now, don’t feed the children all that “wisdom”, teach them to be free and responsible, to take care of our common home and to consider man as an only species which can only survive by leaving in peace.

    Costa Rica Posted by Maria L. Etchart on Nov 27, 2003 at 12:14 AM

    Badda bing: Lamest…Comment…EVER.

    All I can say is that hip Christianity (of all denominations) has come and gone before, and with any luck “Revolve” will go the way of Jack T. Chick tracts.

    United States Posted by Strelnikov on Nov 27, 2003 at 8:01 AM

    Perhaps it _is_ the “opiate of the masses.” 

    United States Posted by ryokan on Nov 27, 2003 at 8:39 AM

    Oh well, in society as it is today, I guess the almighty dollar is more important even than religion. There is no way that I think this publisher is out to preach the word “only” in this girly Bible…he/she is out to make money!  From what I’ve seen from the current administration, this publisher is simply following what his “religious political leaders” are teaching….chase the buck first, then God.

    United States Posted by Sue on Nov 27, 2003 at 5:07 PM

    The bible also says to sell your little girl into sexual slavery in Lev. or green lights slavery in Gen. 
    I bet that is left out…

    United States Posted by captain chaos on Nov 29, 2003 at 10:05 AM

    What a bunch of claptrap!!!  To dumb down the bible so that teens get the “true” meaning of a mostly myth-based religion is ridiculous.

    In reality, the world needs to be rid of all three “sky-god” Abrahamic religions.  Time for humans to grow up and—for once—think about the difference between the nature of the Transcendant and mistaking it as a myth.

    It’s time to bring back Paganistic Tribalism.  This is the only way humans will ever find true peace and cooperation and spirituality.

    United States Posted by Lady Madonna on Dec 2, 2003 at 12:05 AM

    The Old Testament I find disturbing and conflicting with the New Testament in some ways. I think if my teen-age daughter would peruse the Old Testament and come across the story of Lot and his daughters I would have to expound on that situation myself, instead of relying on this -no offence meant- Christian publications that purport males to be the designated leaders.  My parents taught me to help the needy, to be kind, and to try very hard to have a soft heart . She did not have a Bible to read to us, or for us to read; we learned through her actions. I have The Bible, I have The Koran also; my children never read them. Perhaps I should buy them this new, pop-Bible. Perhaps I should just ask them what The Golden Rule really, really means-then when they feel like it they could buy their own glossy, chic Bible from the hip purveyors of God’s words. Maybe for a few more bucks they could even listen to it , hip-hop or rock style.

    United States Posted by tess on Dec 3, 2003 at 8:37 AM

    It should be noted that while Romans 1:24-27 does in fact say that homosexuality is wrong, an equally important part of that particular passage, Romans 1:26, clearly states that women have one (and only one) “natural use” ... to serve as sexual objects for the pleasure of men.

    Girls do need to learn about the Bible.  They need to learn what God thinks of them.

    China Posted by sander on Dec 3, 2003 at 2:44 PM

    “In reality, the world needs to be rid of all three “sky-god” Abrahamic religions. ...
    It’s time to bring back Paganistic Tribalism. “

    So we should get rid of what other people nelieve in and only have what you believe in? 

    I don’t know - it looks like Paganistic Tribalism teaches too much intolerance for me.

    Just as intolerant as “they’re not trying and their hearts have already shown themselves for what they are”


    Right.  They don’t read well, they don’t deserve it, it’s their fault that they are condemned to perdition and therefore not as important as you are.

      I guess you read the Bible in Hebrew, not the dumbed down English version?

    United States Posted by Nus on Dec 5, 2003 at 9:41 PM

    “It should be noted that while Romans 1:24-27 does in fact say that homosexuality is wrong, an equally important part of that particular passage, Romans 1:26, clearly states that women have one (and only one) “natural use” ... to serve as sexual objects for the pleasure of men.”

    Romans 1:26 states, “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts.  Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones.”  There are many arguments one could logically take with the Bible, citing specific texts.  But when people like ‘sander’ start making up Bible verses that don’t exist, you lose your credibility and your argument.

    United States Posted by Anna on Dec 6, 2003 at 5:06 AM

    After my first trip to Italy I was struck by the usurpation by the christian church of all things Roman. By creating the myths of christ and persecution of christians, the church—built upon the greatest violence and marketing chicanery unleashed upon humankind—was and is indeed a very convenient tool to rule and fool the masses.

    If you care to look, you can see where the Mohammedan extremism of today gets its inspiration from.

    Hopefully, all “my way or highway” thought processes professing to be religions will end up as failed political ideologies.

    United States Posted by dbaldwin on Dec 6, 2003 at 9:39 PM

    I consider pat robertson a fascist shill, when my 40 y.o. ‘girlfriend’ wanted me to videotape the 700 club show off TV, I knew the relationship was a lost cause.

    United States Posted by bob amongst many bobs on Dec 9, 2003 at 6:38 AM

    You can read about this with a picture of the cover in the current issue of Adbusters.
    http://adbusters.org/
    It’s disgusting. It delivers the Bible through a simplistic American consumeristic filter. It’s EXACTLY the kind of myopic, simplemeinded horseshit that will have the girls who read it mistakenly dismissing people of different faiths as worthless and hellbound, and to focus only on themselves and the shiny new SUV in their own driveway. It’s the template for the world we now live in: Where Bush is marching off to destroy the planet and millions of people who are not Americans. I hope this thing stays in the USA. Americans are so ignorant, selfish and fucking stupid that they deserve shit like this. Now if only they wouldn’t build nukes and cover the Earth in satellites, I wouldn’t care. Fuck off, USA.

    Canada Posted by Bob Brown on Dec 9, 2003 at 8:08 AM

    enjoy this

    United States Posted by Shuaigege on Dec 10, 2003 at 7:46 AM

    “It encourages girls to go to college….”  What girls does it encourage to go to college? The ones who can’t read the Bible because it’s too long? What kind of college are they going to attend? One where all the coursework comes out of magazines? PEOPLE 101? ADVANCED SEVENTEEN? LONG WORDS FOR ILLITERATES? (Hell, that might actually help them!) Are they READING the magazines, or just looking at the pictures?

    United States Posted by Narwhal on Dec 15, 2003 at 10:41 AM
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